Face Your Fears

I’m not a big fan of heights, or in fact, small spaces. So when we took a trip to Paris last Summer and entered a hundred-year-old elevator in the Eiffel Tower to get to the top, I was hesitant. For me, I had to fight a battle of fear in my head while taking slow breaths and saying mini prayers. Then when we reached the top, I needed to focus on the physical sensations of my feet touching the floor and my hands in contact with the railings to stay grounded and not allow my fears to get the best of me. A victory, for sure.

A common theme in movies and books includes a main character who is afraid of something and then chooses to overcome their fear through a brave act to protect others, defeat a foe, or save the world. This is a well-received theme in movies because everyone can relate to being afraid in certain situations or afraid of other people, and we all desire to have the bravery to overcome the fear (or wish we did in the past). 

Fear is powerful in our lives. It tends to take hold of our hearts and lead us away from security. Sometimes it motivates us. Other times it paralyzes us. Fear promises to protect us from discomfort, rejection, ridicule, and harm. Fear demands our obedience or else something bad will happen. It projects a worst-case scenario we are certain will occur. Our obedience to fear results in being controlled (enslaved) by it as it prevents us from making wise decisions, having new experiences, meeting new people, or even taking steps toward having a “normal” life. The greatest way to overcome such controlling fears is to face them head-on.

If you have fear (anxieties) in your life that might be controlling and contributing to your life negatively, here are a few tips to face them head-on:

1. Identify the Fruits of Fear: The fruits of fear consist of actions within your body or choices you make when fear is present. What do you do when you are uncomfortable, anxious, or in a situation in which you are unsure? Do you bite your nails? Sweat? Yell at others? Do you clean and get organized (control your environment)? Do you eat more? Sleep less? Sleep more? Withdraw from others? Put your wall up? Try to please people? Get angry or impatient? Think or obsess over your fear? Catastrophize? These are all your fruits or actions that evidence fear and anxiety in your life. Write them down on a piece of paper. 
2. Look at your Heart: Your actions provide a glimpse into your heart, even if you don't know it. The heart (and mind) is where fears are rooted. Ask yourself: "What is it that I am afraid of? What do I fear?" Common fears include fear of rejection, fear of being abandoned by those who love you, fear of being hurt physically or emotionally, fear of losing control, fear of being a failure, fear of the unknown, fear of suffering, fear of death, etc. Once you can identify the fear, you can identify the heart’s desire or demand (idol). A fear of rejection is often a deeper need for people’s approval. A fear of failure can be a deeper need for self-worth or significance. A fear of heights or flying can include a deep need to be safe (at peace) and secure. Identifying this deeper need positions us in a place to invite Christ to speak to us.
3. Face your Fear through a Relationship with your Savior: Heart issues including self-worth, significance, peace, and security are met through a relationship with Christ. The person who promises never to leave nor forsake you, is with you always, whose burden is light, and whose name is the Prince of Peace desires to give us peace in our anxieties. He gives us worth in his love and grace, eternity security through his death and resurrection, and grace to get through any situation we are confronted with. He gives us himself. If Christ has promised to set us free (Jn 8:36), then a continuous relationship with Christ is a relationship without the enslavement of fear. 

Overcoming our fears is no small feat. We simply cannot do it alone. We cannot rescue ourselves from the enslavement of fear, but we need a rescuer…a Savior. Facing our fears head-on is not about finding strength in ourselves, but admitting we are weak and powerless so that He may demonstrate his grace and strength in us. Facing our fears is identifying the fruits of fear, and asking the questions to get to the deep needs of our hearts so that we can trust in Jesus for our greatest needs. The Prince of Peace is ready and waiting for you.

If you need help to face your fears, schedule an appointment with one of our qualified Christ-centered counselors at www.foundchristcounsel.org, or by phone at 877-414-HOPE (4673). We’re happy to walk beside you.